Cerberus the 5th
by Blaze ocean dragon
Summary: My life is simple. I'm an Umbreon. I steal stuff. Simple. ...Why isn't my life simple?
1. Breaking and Entering

Well well well. You may be asking, "Blaze Ocean Dragon! You update infrequently enough as it is! Why are you making another story for God's sake!?Shift1111?!"

Well the answer is, first, DON'T PANIC.

Secondly, don't worry. This is more or less something for me to work on if I tire of writing Until Dawn, to loosten up plot bunnies in my head. Plus, it takes place in the same continuality (however, I might say, PRIOR to Until Dawn), so you might find interesting refferences.

Lastly, before I end this hideously long Author's note, this will be updated erratically, probably as few as one update a month. Or several, if I feel like working on it.

Tally-ho-

-Blaze

* * *

_Dear Diary,_

_Despite you being an inanimate wad of paper, (which, I may add, is unpleasantly damp and curled at the edges for reasons I'd rather not think about. However, I must inquire as to why it smells vaguely of sausage, as I'm quite sure butchers do not keep diaries, and certainly do not toss them to the heavens blank), I feel you are the only being who could possibly understand me._

_For, despite how the cliché goes, I shall be the only one to read your precious cargo with, my very own eyes. And of course, who could understand me, but me?_

…_Apparently, everyone else, for I'm not having a good job deciding who I am. Others have though, as everyone knows exactly what I'm supposed to be. _

_It's unfortunate all their 'right' answers however, tend to contradict eachother._

_Perhaps I'm getting a bit ahead of myself. I wouldn't want to confuse any omniscient, extraterrestrial viewers who read this without knowing the backing behind it, wouldn't I? Well, perhaps I should start by listing what I know._

_I know my name is Cerberus Fenrir the Fifth, and I am a descendant of the famous Umbreon ghost and demon hunter, Fenrir the first. It is said demons scattered at his howl (despite howling being a rather uncouth action, not to mention rather pathetic from an Umbreon. I myself can manage no more than a dull rasp, and decided to cease further attempts to emulate my ancestor after it was comment my howl was "cute"), and ghosts were instantly disintegrated at the touch of his fang. It is said he met his end only at the hands of Giratina himself; However, before so, managed to heavily damage his physical manifest form and doom him to perpetual confinement to his hellish realm between Life and Death. _

_Of course, this is obvious complete poppycock, as if Giratina exists (Which I highly doubt) I'm sure he would've tried to attack us, or send ghosts or something. As is stands, I haven't found anyone, not even a Ghost type that could verify Gitatina's existence to me. In short, he's as much a fairy tale as his counterpart Arceus; fictional characters made by Pokemon and humans unable to cope with the fact the legendaries are the top of the food chain._

_Where was I? Oh, right. Secondly, I know I am a male Umbreon._

_Yeah._

_No real explanation there._

_In any case, this is where things start getting foggy for myself, as I have two conflicting facts I would both like to embrace. Firstly, I am a thief; No, not a thief…a GREAT thief! I pity petty humans who attempt half the stuff I've done, as there is no feasible way they could do it with their unnecessary bulk, lack of balance and general lack of elemental fucking powers. _

_Yes, the elemental powers come handy, despite my strange methods of using them. My father, the honorable Lupin Fenrir the Fourth, bless his eternal soul, was a great Umbreon to set foot on the land, but was more than slightly chauvinistic. I still haven't received the knowledge of exactly which one of his various mistresses is my birth mother, although I'm fairly sure the knowledge has something to do why my abilities are, how you would say… less similar to the average Umbreon._

_Ah, but once again I stray from the point. Yes, I am a great thief, and I intend to make a name for myself as great as my ancestor himself; but while he slayed creatures of the night, I shall steal under the cover of it. Truthfully, my fur color isn't quite fit for it; A respectable dark-shade of grey I might add, that has nothing to do with my age I assure you- but I have already accomplished more in my short lifespan than most would-be human 'thieves' did in their entire fifty or whatever years of THEIR career. And they got caught. So, I'd say this grants me the title of 'Great' thief. Hell, I'm good enough I'm not even wanted by the police; Umbreon are so much harder to track down than humans._

_In any case, that brings me to my second controversial truth;… I am… in love._

_Stop laughing._

_This isn't one of those Catwoman relationships. I can assure you the object of my affections would find my career more than slightly detestable, and I highly doubt she has a violent bone in her body. _

…_Seriously, stop damned laughing. You're a piece of paper for Mew's sake, either that or myself, who really shouldn't be laughing at his own misfortunes, or that extraterrestrial fourth wall audience I mentioned earlier, who are probably all jackasses and don't need to add to their jack-assery._

_…Perhaps it would be better if I explained myself. See, it all happened during one warm spring night…_

"I told you it would work!" I boasted to my comrade, who simply rolled her eyes in her normal fashion.

"Yeah yeah, so you came up with a plan that didn't kill us all for once. So the score's what, fifteen love?"

I chuckled slightly. "Love? I'm afraid you misunderstand our relationship, Rose. It's purely platonic, you see. Business and whatnot."

Rose rolled her eyes, giving me a look that could only be described as a half-hearted death glare. Of course, I had learned long ago to take heed of even half-assed warnings, under penalty of being punished by the scythe attached to her cranium.

The Absol was well groomed, which was a first, her horn and claws polished. Her fur was void of all tangles, and was white as new snow. Of course, all that played second to the ultimate accessory; a small blue bow, tied to the hilt of the sword merged into her skull. I had laughed myself silly at that, actually suggesting she change it to pink. Normally, I'd be afraid of her possibly bloody response, but of course she knew I had to keep clean for our plan to work. And bloodstains don't come out easilly.

I myself, had very little to change. My sleek grey fur, which was respectably groomed at the worst of times and obsessively clean at the best, fit in well with the high-classed crowd we were mingling with. Still, I had cleaned my fangs, brushed my fur once again, and picked out a nice black bowtie to wear. I looked rather handsome, if I may say so myself. And, of course, I was no stranger to the secrets of the higher classed, for I had lived out my life as a kit with my father, who in turn lived with a human butler. Over time, habits similar to the human's job began to grow in me, simply from his and my dear old pa's actions.

I didn't mind; I think it had a certain charm to it, being a polite and refined thief. Much more of a respectable image than a dirty street urchin climbing in through the chimney. I had _class. _

Unfortunately, my partner did _not, _as was evident from her slightly nervous plucking at her finely groomed fur, which I noted with distaste. It had taken me hours to groom her veritable forest of tangles and knots into something half-decent, as she obviously couldn't be trusted to it herself.

"Stop fidgeting!" I whispered to her, annoyed. Obviously, I couldn't very well say I was being annoyed at her messing up the fur I spent hours licking and grooming into place, as she wouldn't take it seriously. And would probably mess it up later again, just to spite me.

"I don't like it here." She whispered back, not particularly subtly. "So many uptight jackasses in such a small place… I'm feeling claustrophobic." She growled very slightly, as I glanced around to make sure nobody took note of her temperament.

"I swear, if I ever settle down…" she continued. I rolled my eyes, muttering under my breath about the unlikeliness of that. Whatever male she chose would have to be flat out insane to stick around.

"You can be sure it won't be a rich jerkwad, like these" she finished, still growling slightly. I noticed one of the other Pokemon turn around to look at her inquisitively, a male Glaceon looking particularly effeminate. She snarled at him slightly, and he instantly recoiled, burying himself hastily in the crowd.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, real subtle Rose." I muttered. The absol shrugged her shoulders good naturedly, which I raised my eyebrow at. "Subtle isn't my skill area. That's yours."

I shrugged. It was true enough. "Let's appear by the punch bowl." I offered. "It'll be a good enough alibi. Everyone converses at the punch bowl. By the way, we're happy mates, we have one male kit named Thomas, and we were invited here by Mr.Stockwell."

Rose nodded, her lip curling in distaste, presumably at the personality she had to play. Or the thought of being mated to me, but that was far less likely.

We cozied up to a female Eevee and a male Pikachu, who were chatting animatedly by said punch bowl, both holding glasses, and of course, not taking a sip. It was common knowledge punch was not to be drunken, but used as an excuse to ditch bad dates, chat and pick up potentional admirers. I detected a certain amount of magnetism between the two of them with a chuckle. Thinking of breaking that purity barrier? How very naughty of them.

Then again, perhaps that was the point, forbidden love and all that, of which I've been told novels are quite popular among the crowd. Ironic, considering if any of them were in such a book, they would most definitely be the purity Nazis stopping the two lovers from getting together. It was quite laughable to me, but eh, what do I know?

We chatted with the two for a while, of which inane and pointless banter was quite popular. The Pikachu, annoyingly enough, seemed obsessed with getting the last greeting compliment in, to a ridiculous degree. Not to be outdone, I matched him each time, adding another compliment to the chain. Our completely pointless batch of banter went on for several minutes, until, finally tiring of our complete idiocy (of which I'll happily admit to), both our respective females wacked us lightly across the head.

I could tell by the glare Rose was giving me that next him, she'd use her horn-blade instead of paw. And aim for my neck rather than head.

I grinned sheepishly. She rolled her eyes, which was at least better than a death glare. I faked a look at the clock.

"Oh look at the time. I'm afraid we will have to depart soon; it's been so pleasant speaking with you, but we must be going."

I kissed the Eevee's paw, and she giggled slightly. The Pikachu's ear twitched in annoyance.

Rose blinked at me, and shrugged, as we began to walk away. The Eevee called after us slightly. "If you can, please attempt to stay a bit longer. Shira's still yet to come, and she's the host, you know."

I flashed a grateful grin to her, heard her minor swoon (Or so I envisioned; Rose would probably interoperate it as a giggle at my expense).

"That went well" I muttered to her. She rolled her eyes. "The Pikachu hates you now" she muttered back.

I made a look of mock surprise. "I can't help my devilishly good looks, charming personality, and impeccable fashion sense" I rattled off, tapping my bowtie as I listed the last item. Once again, the absol rolled her eyes.

"Whatever" She whispered back. "Still, we really do have to go. We have Twenty-seven minutes, sixteen seconds before Gol makes his move. Let's get into position."

I nodded in agreement and we climbed up the large staircase. I noticed the tasteful decorations of the room, the old vases and whatnot, which were all plenty unobtrusive. Crystal was a reoccurring theme, from the chandelier to the ornaments, but there wasn't a spec of gold around. Which was great, considering I absolutely detested gold; it was just so…gaudy, and flaunting. Crystal, on the other hand, well that was refined. It was beauty, and not just beautiful because of it's price; It wasn't even diamond, which emphasized the theme of beauty over price, and I found myself respecting the decorator. They, at least, had taste.

Pity we were going to rob them blind.

We sat down at the table we had decided on, on the second floor balcony, overlooking the main door. Two large windows were on either side, but there was none above us, and to our left was a door. Currently it was off-limits, but when we got our distraction…

We watched the clock tick down. Fifteen minutes. Ten minutes. Eight minutes. Seven minutes. Six minutes, fifty five seconds.

And so on.

After a while, I started to get bored, and started looking down. I noticed the door open.

Then, I paused as I watched who was entering. My heart sped up. Time seemed to stop.

Despite the cliché, I could honestly believe she was an angel on earth.

She had the same look of wealth and bringing up on her face, but rather than look like a stuck-up bastard with it, she looked simply regal. Her fur was thick and fluffy, as one would expect from a flareon, but also groomed and combed back to give it more of a slick appearance. The result was a thinner bunch of fur at the front, and thicker at the back and towards the feet, making it look as if she were walking on a cloud.

The extra room the cleared fur provided showed an impressive figure that I had to physically restrain myself from beginning to drool over. Her curves sloped perfectly downwards, across the stomach smoothly to other areas my mind was prone to first going to at first sight of her. Although I couldn't tell the color from my vantage point, her eyes were perfectly shaped and placed in her face, large enough to maker her look innocent as a kit and yet small enough to know she was serious, and not to be pushed around.

Her tail trailed behind her, like an elegant dress and the wispy final parts of the cloud she stood upon, but even from the distance, I could tell it was even softer than said cloud metaphor. And, as she were a flareon, probably much warmer and more comfortable too. At the moment, I felt all I wanted was to be wrapped in said warm tendril and explore the rest of the goddess's body.

Her ears were less so, and more extensions and accents of her face, framing her eyes and giving her an unique look. They were perfectly triangular and pointed, looking altogether as soft and perfect as the rest of her body, and yet functional as if she could here his whisper from her space below.

And all of this was accompanied by a warm feeling spreading through my being, starting from the pit of my gut and moving swiftly to the center of my chest.

At that moment, Rose decided to give me a shove, breaking me out of my spell at glaring at her slightly. She glared back, and I backed down, not willing to test her notoriously low patience.

"What are you looking at, anyway…" She shoved me to the side, walking over to the banister to have a better look. She raised an eyebrow upon viewing the perfection that was my Flareon, turning to me with a look of puzzlement.

"The necklace looks valuable, but I don't think pearls go for quite THAT much these days…" She muttered, gesturing.

I blinked, noticing the ring of peals around the female I had been watching's neck, obviously having missed them previously. It wasn't quite hard to see why, as they were minimalistic and frankly paled in comparison to the rest of her form.

"Uh…right…Well, I was looking at the, err, black pearl in the center. Yeah." I finished unimpressively, and frankly unconvincingly. I suppose I'm lucky that despite the irony of the statement, Rose isn't the sharpest quill on the Sandlash.

Rose shook her head, looking inquisitively at the Flareon. I glanced around awkwardly, although I found I had an irritating urge to gawk at her again (The Flareon, not Rose. Gawking at Rose is typically a bad idea).

"There isn't a black pearl on the necklace…" She muttered after a moment.

"O-oh, really?" I said, with rather phony surprise. "It must've been a trick of the eyes, then."

Something dawned in Rose's eyes, as she stalked around me with a strange grin that was somehow creepier than her death glare. "You wouldn't happen to …_like_, that Flareon, would you?" She asked, reminding me unpleasantly of an Arbok coiling to strike.

"Uh…N-no of cour-"

My half-hearted denial was stopped by the load sound of glass smashing, as a window west of us exploded into glass shards and rained down onto the floor below. There were screams from the guests, when suddenly both windows to either side of Rose and eye were shattered in a similar way, a small black spike visible for a few seconds as the cause of the break.

"That's our cue!" I said, grateful for the distraction, though I felt a twinge of regret I wouldn't get to meet the Flareon now… Later. I'd search for her later.

Rose made an unhappy sound, obviously angry at being denied her gloating, but ran towards the door we had been waiting to enter. There was one guard -Or random bystander, hardly mattered which-, a surly looking Sandslash that was too buisy gawking at the massive windows being destroyed that he didn't notice the massive organic blade launched at his head, until he was sprawled onto the floor.

Rose pried open the door with her claws, and we both entered into a dimly lit corridor, with red carpeting. It was seemingly empty, so once we closed the door we walked at only a brisk pace.

"Hopefully this isn't another fucking death course…" Rose muttered under her breath, as I chuckled. We've had to traverse enough of them, in increasingly illogical places, that it was now more of an expectation. Seriously, what business CEO builds a Death Maze under his house? Mind boggling, all humans…

"No, I doubt this corridor is booby trapped. It looks like it's a normal part anyway, just closed off for the duration of the party." I mentioned, still walking down the hall. It was a decent enough guess, as there were still decorations lining the sides.

"Did you find out exactly who this Shira is?" I asked after a moments silence. I knew the humans who owned the mansion were Jeffery and Doris Boulieau, but the host of the current party was obviously a Pokemon. From what the Eevee had mentioned, the hostess's name was Shira, though that didn't speak much else about who it was.

Rose rolled her eyes again. She tended to do that a lot, around me. "Cer, we only found out her name was Shira a few moments ago. How, in Arceus' name, would I know who she is?"

I shrugged, choosing not to respond to the general statement she made. "Stop swearing by Arceus. You know it isn't real."

Rose sighed, and gave me another small glare. "Just because you don't believe in Arceus, doesn't mean I don't, Cer. Plus, Arceus is a her."

"And how would you know, Rose?" I shot back. "About the gender thing. But also her existence, that's one thing too. Please, explain why nobody- has ever- damned saw her. At least the other legendaries appear from time to time, we can be sure of their existence. But still, they aren't even that powerful, certainly not creators of the world. Hell, I'm not even sure about Dialga or Palkia, the only accounts I hear of them could very well just be over exaggerated human responses to seeing a Salamence, or Gachomp or whatever for the first time.".

Rose shot me another glare.

I dropped the topic.

Eventually, after walking through the frankly uninteresting hallway, we came to a crossroads, with a hall going in each direction.

"Split up?" I offered.

She rolled her eyes. "I would be my pleasure" She said through slightly gritted teeth, assumingly for emphasis. She took the right passageway, while I took the left, looking for something worth money.

We'd come looking for a specific diamond, known as the 3rd Cerafocle Diamond, named after James Cerafocle, the original discoverer. It was roughly the size of a human's fist, and curious in the fact it (along with its two brothers, the first and second Cerafocle) had a trapped fossile within it, easily visible within the clear diamond. It was nearly priceless in value, if sold to the right scientific industry (the fact most of the buyers would be Rockets didn't particularly phase me).

The safe would almost certainly be hidden, but with Shira's luck and hypersensitive senses, it would be rather easy for her to find it. I, on the other hand, had certain abilities that would make its location much easier to find.

My eyes glew a bright yellow, as my vision became tinged blue and much less descriptive. However, a large plus was everything now appeared translucent, revealing the interior brickwork and beams holding up the house. My other senses, most notably hearing, were strongly impaired as I did this, but now finding anything hidden in a wall would be child's play.

I walked a little this way, musing to myself about the odd things hidden in the walls. Once, I remember I had seen a human corpse… Of course, passing by it silently, while retching to myself… And other times there were stashes of money, or old baseball or Pokemon Trainer cards that were worth a fair bit of money in this day and age.

Of course, now all I was looking was a safe, which was good because metals generally appeared more solid than rock or cement in this mode. Plants less dense than trees were essentially invisible, but oddly enough the bone structures of organic creatures showed up clear as daylight.

After a few more minutes of walking, I paused, then sighed, letting my sight return to normal. I was in a small room, with a couple chairs and an old TV in the corner. Unfortunately, there were three directions I could go from here- Either into the kitchen, which looked in frank disuse, or two new long hallways that I couldn't see the end of.

I sighed, choosing at random to go through the left passageway.

"I wouldn't go that way."

I froze, and silently turned around with a gulp. No less than three steps away from me was a female Smeargle with a broom, quietly sweeping. She apparently didn't find it odd she was sweeping carpet.

"Uh..."I paused, dumbfound. How did she sneak up on me like that? Either that, or I was INCREDIBLY inattentive.

"Go right." She said after a moment, not pausing in her sweeping. I blinked, silently nodded, turned and went down the right passageway. Could I trust her? Hell no. Did I have to? Apparently yes, as she hadn't called for any guards yet and going the contrary route would be suspicious. I assumed the right path brought me back to the main room.

Only then did I realize my curious capture had an oddity; I had seen smeargles before, but they all had the tips of their tails dyed some color. This one did not.

I turned around to mention it to her, genuinely curious was I, but blinked in surprise.

She was gone.

I shrugged, paused for a seconed, then continued walking down that path, once again activating my X-ray (Yes, I know X rays probably aren't involved in its execution, considering I can see through lead, but it's simpler than calling it my See-through-stuff vision) vision again in order to see if there was any safe along the way.

I followed the hallway for a good five minutes (How big was this place?), before I paused. Then a grin overtook my face, as I scanned the distance again; Within my eyesight, I could see a room. But more than that, in that room was a safe. Bingo.

I dashed towards it, then skidded to a stop, making myself small in the nook of the wall as I noticed there were three people in the room up ahead.

And, when I negated my X-vision, I swallowed as I noticed one of them was my Flareon.

I felt a pit in my stomach open up as I noticed who the other two in the room were. One was a smaller, younger looking male white Eevee. That wasn't too much trouble, I could live with that. …Well, unless he was her mate, but I doubted that as she was regarding her with frank boredom.

But the other visitor troubled me much more, as unfortunately, it was an Espeon.

A psychic.

Capable of detecting me from twice the range I was at, wall or no wall.

I breathed a sigh of relief after a couple seconds, none of them having noticed me. Obviously, the Espeon either wasn't skilled enough to detect Dark types like myself, or she wasn't scanning the area like most psychics did constantly.

The white Eevee yawned. "When's this going to be over, Shira? I get bored at places like here… people always give me dirty looks…"

My flareon gave him a small grin. "There just jealous, Ven, Don't mind them. In any case, how are you enjoying the party, Ceii?"

The Espeon shrugged, looking towards her paws. "I d-don't really like places with so many people…"

Once again, the flareon shook her head. "Don't go acting like Mateo now, Ceii. Why have you been so nervous now, all of a sudden."

The Espeon shook her head. "No reason, Shira." She said weakly.

I nodded to myself. So, my Flareon's name was Shira. What a beautiful name, melodic, simple, artful in pronunciation, familiar…

…Wait, familiar?

The gears in my head started clinking. Her name was Shira… the hostess' name was Shira… the hostess was the Pokemon of the owner of this mansion… of which I was going to steal from.

I nearly collapsed.

_I had fucking fallen in love with the owner of the place I was going to steal from!_


	2. Or not, I suppose

Dear Diary,

_Dear Diary,_

_Once again, I find myself recording my thoughts within your damp inner pages. I admit, I see the novelty of committing my thoughts and expressions to paper proper, which is a better solution than letting them rest in my head, where I'd promptly forget them._

_Now, as for my hypothetical audience I mentioned earlier, I suppose you must be somewhat confused about my prior installment. First and foremost is the issue of my 'See through stuff vision'; unfortunately, it makes about as little sense to me as it does you._

_For you see, ever since I was but a small kit, I've never been able to use regular techniques well. Learning Shadow Ball, a relatively commonplace and useful technique commonly employed by any given Eon, was a behemoth task for me, and I'm afraid I don't believe the effort matched up to the result; my shadow ball, is at the very best, sub-par. Mediocre, even. So as you can see, I dislike utilizing it too often; Unfortunately, even for my pathetic glob of ectoplasm, it costs me more energy than I'd care to._

_My Dark Pulse, a normal signature move of the Umbreon species, is not much better. While I can shape one much easier than I can the former technique, and while it has a touch more of a force behind it, I unfortunately find myself tuckered out from even two Pulses a few seconds from eachother. Thus, while it is a bit more useful than my Shadow Ball, even Dark Pulse is impractical for me to use._

_As for my last technique I've been able to use, well, I assume my teeth are strong enough for Bite, though I'd never want to check. I mean really, who would want to put their mouth around someone's body part to inflict injury? Eugh, it makes me shiver at the very thought, introducing all sorts of vile germs and whatnot- And even worse if you drew blood. Unlike most of my race, I don't see the appeal of blood, aside from being a perfect domain for vicious bacteria to hide in. So as such, Bite and all related techniques are quite out of the question._

_The end result of all this, is of course, an Umbreon without an adequate way to defend himself, as I usually end up being. Of course, by the rule of balance nature seems to be prone to, I've been given some… interesting genetic abilities to make up for it. Nothing that could really be of any danger to an opponent, I might admit, but useful in my line of work. The ability for me to see through solid objects happens to be one of those, and one of my most used; Also one of the simplest to use, I may add, while other abilities might gradually tire me. _

_Now, what are these abilities you might ask? My my, aren't we an inquisitive theoretical bunch, aren't we? Even so, this intro would perhaps be too long should I list them, all so they shall come in time. Aren't I a kind narrator, saving you the trouble to worrying over and an every one of my oddities? _

_Ah insanity, how I love your refuge, and how you make taunting a nonexistent audience enjoyable! _

_Well in any case, should you remember (I am not quite sure why you would, seeing as you are inanimate or nonexistent, whether you be the book itself or the afor-mentioned nonexistent audience, respectively) when I last left you off, I had come to the startling conclusion that my newfound love, my angel at first sight, was the owner of the pleasant abode I had been plotting to steal. Naturally, this put me in a difficult position as it is, however it was complicated by the fact I was currently hiding behind a short wall, next to the door to the following room, where she and two other Eons lay. Naturally, I did not want to be detected, and thus taint her impression of me forever._

_Perhaps I should explain myself. I had, somewhat blinded by my X-Ray vision, stumbled down a one-way hallway, which ended in the room where the three Eons were sitting. This room was separated from the hallway by a small wall, opening in the center to allow an entryway without a door. There were a pair of doors inside the room itself, most likely leading to other areas._

_I couldn't attempt to go through either door, nor back through the hallway, without risking being spotted; How I managed to walk down the hall without being found out the first time was a mystery to myself especially. Seeing as nobody was explicitly allowed past the inner doors here, I hadn't a very good alibi, seeing as someone had just smashed each and every window, allowing for mass panic._

_With very little time to think, you might be able to understand the genius of my idea to get out of this problem._

_I walked straight in._

"Madam Shira!" I exclaimed, with sufficiently convincing panic in my voice. "Pardon my intrusion, but I could not find you among the scramble outside, and I had t-"

"Who are you?" The Flareon demanded, her eyes watching me suspiciously. I very nearly froze up, a not entirely unpleasant chill going down my spine as she addressed me, perhaps moreso do to the demanding tone in her voice.

"My name is Cerberus, Milady." I said with a respectful semi-bow. The white Eevee blinked, while the espeon flicked her tail and giggled slightly. "And I had to alert you, but it appears villains have infiltrated the building, no doubt with the intention to steal from you! And since you did not witness them breaking the windows, I took it upon myself to alert you."

The Espeon paled slightly behind her violet fur. "Villains? You mean, burglars and such?"

I nodded in response. "The very same, miss…"

"Ceii." She responded, the blood returning to her face quickly. Perhaps even in excess, as I noticed a slight tinge of a blush around her cheeks. Well, that was well enough.

"And you, Master…" I said, turning to the white Eevee. The albino blinked at me for a moment, before licking a paw. "Ven. But don't call me Master Ven, please."

I nodded slightly. "Of course, Lord Ven." I heard him gag slightly at the name, but spoke fast enough to interrupt his protest. "In any case Mistress Shira, I hope I have not acted too presumptuous by seeking you out…"

The Flareon chuckled. "Not at all. In any case, I doubt there is much to worry about; a burglary among this many people would make it nigh-impossible to steal anything from the main chambers. The only items of real value kept not in the main room are within the Vault, which is within here." She gestured at a relatively blank wall, which I assume folded down to reveal a safe. "So, in order for these would-be thieves to find anything of any worth before the police caught up with them, they would need to enter here, and I am quite assured of my abilities to fight off opponents. In any case, there are four of us here now; quite enough to overwhelm any opportunistic thief".

I begged to differ, innerly noting that it was very likely that Rose could take on the four of us while blindfolded and with two broken limbs, but obviously didn't comment. I knew nothing of the battle skills of the three anyway… and, dear to my heart, I found it difficult to believe there wasn't anything she couldn't do. Urg, I was beginning to annoy even myself with my lovey-dovy act. As long as I didn't show it physically… I mean really, love at first sight? It's a ridicules concept used as a shortcut for cheap romance novels! I mean, really, I can't have fallen that deep in love with a Flareon I just met-

I blinked, and shaked my head, attempting to get the visions of her tail from my mind. It was difficult enough to do, considering I had been staring at it for the last few seconds without knowing it. Luckilly, neither female eon seemed to notice it. The Eevee did, however, and smirked at me as he was grooming pompously.

I grimaced slightly. I had a feeling I wasn't going to get along with this guy.

"I apologize for my use of pretense… but, would it be overstepping my boundaries to ask what the relationship exists between you entails?" I said politely. By Mew, It was lucky my human and late father were Butlers; the training was coming in useful when talking to a crowd like this.

The white Eevee smirked again. I resisted the urge to scowl at him; I was getting to hate that smirk. It didn't help the Eevee looked to be at least two years younger than me.

"We're siblings." The Eevee clarified. I nodded slightly… that was good. At least it meant she isn't taken by a pompous unevolved with white fur.

"Three of five, actually." The Flareon piped in. I was grateful for that, much rather having heard it from the goddess than from the annoying Eevee. Although I was surprised to hear that, something else was bugging me; even if the Eevee wasn't her mate, there was the likely chance someone had already snapped her up before I did. I needed to find out, but I didn't want to be too blatant about it.

"There must be many nieces and nephews" I said, nonchalantly. The Flareon giggled slightly, a pleasant tinkling sound, that made my heart beat faster.

"Not quite." She said after a moment or so. "At the moment, none of us even have mates." I breathed a sigh of relief, hoping the others hadn't noticed. Although betting the Eevee had and would boast subtly in a moment.

"Ven is simply too picky for his own good, as he's refused every female that's came after him since." Shira continued with a glance at the white Eevee. Ven blinked, then scowled slightly, apparently forgetting to gloat at me.

"Shira, I won't pick someone just because they want the connections with my Master." He snorted slightly. "Amazing how common that is among Pokemon, despite the majority of us making do without a penny. In any case, all the females that 'come after me', like you say Shira, don't want anything to do with me for anything other than my Master, and apparently because I'm cute."

I blinked at the Eevee once, but pretended not to be really surprised. Well, that scored him a couple points on the 'Not a jerk' omiter… although his smirk was still annoying.

Shira appeared undisturbed. "Regardless, he's sent back every single female that's come pining after him. In any case, Ceii simply hasn't been fortunate enough to meet anyone worthy to be her mate-"

The Espeon flinched, but I pretended not to notice.

"The same goes for me" The Flareon continued. "As for our last sibling, Mateo, he's… an oddity. Suffice it to say, he hasn't had offers from anyone that he particularly enjoys either."

I nodded slightly, then blinked as a bit of logic conflicted within me. I mentally registered that I was lucky she was sharing her family's love life… scratch that, I was lucky she was talking to me… scratch THAT, I was lucky this goddess didn't see through my ruse and scratch my heart out at the first chance. Not that I would mind…

…Urg, I really have to work on this 'Lovey dovey' thing. It's one thing to be infatuated with such a perfect creature, it's another thing to make myself feel sick.

"Didn't you say you had five siblings?" I said, inquisitively. Instantly, I knew this was the wrong thing to say, as both Ceii and Ven flinched slightly. Shira didn't move, but narrowed her eyes.

"The 'other' sibling as you put it, was… in an accident." She said icily. "Ceila was on a ship which crashed with no survivors. Now if you wouldn't mind, apparently we have a burglary situation going on. I would appreciate it if, Master Cerberus, you would see what the damage is, and perhaps alert the constabulary if they have not been already. I would prefer to stay here." She gestured to a nearby door. I stammered out an apology and agreed, quickly leaving.

'_Well… I sure blew that one.' _I told myself with a sigh, noting how quickly I had been shoved out after asking the question. Apparently, it was a sensitive topic.

I took a look around; the crowd appeared thinner, and perhaps a bit scared, although calm for the moment. I grimaced sourly now that the entire operation had failed in two ways; Firstly, we hadn't got to the safe like we had expected, and two, I had promptly went in, and make a fool of myself with the exceptionally attractive Flareon.

I sighed, enjoying a short 'woe is me' moment, before getting rudely nudged in the side with something sharp. And by 'rudely nudged', I meant knocked over.

As I returned to my feet, I wasn't entirely surprised to see Rose sitting there, looking extremely irritated and, lucky me, I was the nearest by for her to take her angers on.

"Time's up" She hissed in my ear. I nodded slightly; we had agreed on a time we would leave, before the police arrived, which would allow us ample time to get away. Obviously Rose was frustrated she hadn't caught a wiff of a safe, or some container carrying, say, several million dollars worth of a fortune.

"Let's go." I said, trying to sound dejected. It wasn't too hard, as all I had to do was remember my 'woe is me' moment from a couple moments ago.

We walked in silence over to the kitchens, and entered without a word. As expected, the kitchens were cleared; We had arranged for Gol to provide a distraction of a… different sort for the chefs and whatnot after we made our move.

We strode out the door, noting the thumping sound eminating from the door to the kitchen cellars, no doubt still expecting someone to enter and let them go free.

Now, lucky for us, the mansion of which Shira's owner herself owned, was based near a river. It wasn't a particularly big river, that flowed from Lake Mauville, which itself spanned between Slateport and its namesake city. The river reached up, apparently stopping somewhere around the entrance to Mount Chimney; Still, we needn't go that

Far.

Rose walked up to the body of water and made the signal; Being, of course, a mild ice beam frosting the top of the waters slightly, before breaking apart. A few moments later, a small creature floated to the top of the relatively small body of water, then opened its tiny mouth, and grew.

And grew, and grew. I doubt anyone would doubt a Quilfish's ability to inflate, and neither me nor Rose did that to Golgarieh, our escape and distractions specialist. Within moments, the Blowfish Pokemon had grown to a size which allowed both Rose and I to wade into the water and grab a ridge of spines, then hold on as he hurled himself down the lazy-paced riverbed.

It's an interesting experience, co-swimming with a Quilfish. First of all, the things are like a massive inner tube; Half the time, you'll be jerked up and downward as the light body tilted to one side or the other, and it felt much too light to be stable.

Secondly, they swim much, MUCH too fast, and Golgarieh wasn't an exception. The Quilfish apparently expelled water ingested through one of their stomachs out several back orifices; all of us were too tactful to ask exactly which ones. The result was him rocketing down the water path like a bullet, causing some water to splash as he slammed through like a juggernaut. At first, it was a disorienting and discomforting experience, until I god used to it.

The same, unfortunately, could not be said of Rose.

"Slow the fu- (gurgle) down, you b-bastard! Sl-ow Spit Ow down! Now! STOP! Watch what you're doi- spit What you're doing!"

I rolled my eyes, wondering when she'd get the concept of closing your mouth so, here's the shocking part, water didn't get in it.

I, on the other hand, relaxed once my claws were embedded in the fish Pokemon's side, using the time to mull over the mission. Well, it was fairly generic… until I met that damned Flareon. Mew be damned, I usually didn't give females the time of day- Unless I were drunk, which I may admit, turns me into a bit of a chauvinist- Or they happened to be Rose, who would probably kill you if you didn't give her the time of day.

And yet, somehow, within a frame of less than thirty minutes, I had become completely obsessed with a Flareon I had just met. Barely met, even; I was obsessed before I even spoke to her.

Was I being shallow, and only wanted her for her body? My mind said… yes.

However my heart, my true heart, my heart of heart, from which my emotions outpoured and become manifest, said… yes also.

Hm. So I suppose that settles it, I was being shallow.

Alright then, I could live with that. Lust was different then love, right? I could deal with lust. It's just a cardinal sin, like all the others I don't really care much for. I didn't pay much attention to Pride or Greed anyway, so what's much more?

Plus, I mused to myself, I already hung out with the embodiment of Wrath itself, packed into the body of an Absol female. On the topic of lust, I would have grinned slightly at the idea of someone lusting after Rose. Past experience told me that wouldn't be a good idea, as Rose didn't respond well to just about anything.

…Err, by past experience, I don't mean I once lusted after Rose. That would be nuts, and definitely isn't true, I assure you. Well, there was that time, in that cave… but in my defense, we were about to freeze to death and the cold does funny things to a person.

In any case, I doubted ANYONE would find her attractive as it was, her looking like a wed houndour. Her fur clung in patches to her body, and she painfully kept her mouth closed shut; probably a good idea, although the fact she was growling probably didn't help matters. Her horn dangled down forgotten, only noticeable when it caught a rock and promptly cleaved it in two. Her tail, being mainly a short black thing reminiscent of her horn, didn't look much different…

Not to say, of course, I was looking at it. That was just the logical deduction and… Okay really, I'm being serious here folks. I don't have a thing for Rose, I'm in enough trouble with the entire Flareon position as it is, I don't need an Absol to worry about too.

In any case, eventually we slowed down to a stop, and appeared by a small lakeside. The air felt chilly, although that could be just because I was soaked to the bone.

Rose got the worst or it, however, detatching herself painfully, one claw at a time, from the side of Gol. The Quilfish had deflated slightly from when they had left, down to roughly 60 of the size he used to be, but didn't seem to be troubled by Rose having left her claws inside him.

"So, how'd it go?" He asked cheerfully, the first words he had spoken since they had met up again.

I shrugged. "Not the best run we've had."

Rose snorted. "I'd call it a complete failure. We didn't get anything; we didn't even find the safe. The Employer's information was bogus."

"Was not!" Came the whiny reply from behind us. I smirked slightly, turning around to see the small form of Shu. The tiny ghost floated, looking slightly agitated. "All that information was completely accurate!" The shuppet protested, the formless body under his head shifting slightly. "You must have just missed it."

Rose snorted again, and rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Thing is, no safe means no profit. No profit means no cut for our little benefactor. So the next bit of information better be good; giving us duds like that is just assuring he doesn't get any cash."

"I'm sure Shu and the Benefactor gets that, Rose." Came another voice, walking out from the trees that went around the small beach. A tan-colored bipedal creature came into view, holding a long bone with a sharpened tip in his right hand, and with a face that looked like a mask of bone.

I cracked a smirk. "Anzy, you weren't even there. How would you know."

The Marrowak shrugged, and didn't respond, instead opting to lean on the unsharpened side of his bone.

"So, anything else interesting happen then?" Anzell (Or, as I knew him, 'Anzy') asked with his trademarked bored tone. The Marrowak frequently tried to get on my nerves, but could never press the right buttons. Seeing as he rarely escorted myself, Rose, Gol and occasionally Shu on an actual mission, the lack of time he actually spent around me in the field could probably testify to that.

I shrugged.

Rose, on the other hand, had a strange grin, marked with a sudden look of realization. She immediately masked herself into a look of boredom, though anyone could see she was suddenly happy. I wondered why, and was vaguely scared.

"Well, Cer found a girlfriend." I paused.

I looked between Anzell and Rose.

I paused again.

I then proceeded to stare at Rose, the only thought running through my mind being _'Evil.'_


End file.
